To COMPROMISE or Not to? 

The moment we hear this word, different feelings or emotions come in us.. Isn’t it? This word may hurt ego in some of us, it seems like giving up, it may seem like defeat, may be weakness, and for some of us it may be love! And ya all these are right in some or the other way or in that particular situation.

Compromise can also mean understanding. Have we ever thought of it? Why do you think the marriages lasted long in the previous generations? Our parents or grandparents have a long lasting relationships or married life. This is because of understanding between them and the major portion of understanding is compromising. Isn’t it better to bend a little than to break the bonding?? This is not only restricted to relationships.

Do we realize that we are compromising in our day to day life knowingly or unknowingly?! The very basic instance that I could tell is how we compromise by understanding with strangers daily. When we ride vehicle there is an understanding between us and the other people who are driving. We make way for the other vehicle to go when we are not in a hurry and our ego doesn’t come into the picture, we understand that a person coming behind  us will overtake and we make way for them or let the person coming opposite to you go first as we know if we also go the same way then neither of us could go further..aren’t all these compromises?? When we can understand the people whom we don’t know and give up on these little things can’t we do the same with our beloved ones?

 But there are things in life in which we can’t and should not compromise too. It may be either in our personal relationship or in general. I feel we should not compromise on our self respect, loyalty, integrity, honesty, discipline and mainly humanity. When we compromise in these then it is not a sign of understanding or love. It is considered as our weakness and inability to be ourselves.Always compromising on anything and everything is also not good and we can’t achieve anything out of it.

Compromise should not be always one way, it should be two way. We should compromise on some things and should not compromise on some things in our life and knowing that difference is all about it.

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The biggest challenge.. BEING YOURSELF!

Is it so easy as we say??! Many of them tell us to be ourselves but do they let us to be ourselves??? Please think!! The answer is NO.. It may be our parents, partner, relatives, teachers, organization where we work or the society as a whole. They all tell us to be ourselves but they want us to be how they want to see us. Don’t you think so? So it is not that easy to be ourselves. It needs courage to be who we really are..yea! Lot of courage! 

Sometimes why don’t we want to be ourselves? There may be many reasons. But when I thought of it, few of them came to my mind and they are:

  • Because we feel we make mistakes. We need to realize that mistakes are a part of process to be a matured person. Just think, for instance, if our friend tells he cut his finger while chopping veggie and bleeded and it hurt a lot. If we haven’t cut or burnt our finger by mistake in our life till now then how can we ever know what that feeling is?? But we can even learn from others mistakes and try not to repeat it.
  • Because we feel we aren’t perfect or have insecurity problem. We need to understand that no one is perfect and it is okay not to be perfect in everything.
  •  Because we compare ourselves with others. This is the biggest blunder we all do in our lives. We can’t be like others and others can’t be like us. That’s the speciality! We need to learn to be happy with ourselves. 

Few of our characteristic traits are in born and those traits define us. So according to me, trying to change that is like being forced to be like someone else just to fit into the group. Like shyness, being serious, little reserved or being silent etc are all okay.. There is nothing wrong and everyone can’t be the same. We need not change all these just to fit into the group or just because people are insisting on us to change. But, if we ourselves feel deep inside that we need to change it and its for us as a betterment of ourselves then we can try. Otherwise its just gonna be fake, we can’t act for a long and we won’t be comfortable.

Do you need happiness?? Then be yourself!! Yes, follow your heart, stand up for what you believe, don’t change your core beliefs and values for anyone. But being ourselves should be for a good cause and for the betterment of our self as a person. It should not disturb the harmony or peace of any individual or society. For instance, a simple thing like if we find a person jumping a signal in traffic or going on foot path in his bike and feel  like saying him it’s wrong, then we need to say it loud. We require that courage because we get scared if that person may scold us or ask us to mind our own business. Do not get scared if you voice out for a good cause. At the same time, if we feel smoking is okay and nothing wrong in it then continue but remember it not only affects our health but also the people around us so do it in private. That’s the difference. 

This process of being ourselves may take  quite a lot of time and courage but it is worth it! Because being ourselves is the perfect way to stand out and why should we deprive the world of our unique personality?!